Surviving EOFY Drinks
How to Never Run Out of Things to Say
“Having bad communication skills is like trying to wink at a girl in the dark, you’re invisible”
End of Financial Year. Where companies close up their laptops and make the pilgrimage down to The Establishment.
Soon, you too will embark on this journey. It won’t be easy. Are you prepared?
Can you effortlessly discuss work projects and holiday plans with Mark?
What about Simon? Can you match his wankerisms over a cocktail or four?
This edition is about surviving EOFY drinks, and more specifically, how to never run out of things to say.
Because when you’re three pino’s in, the music’s blaring and you're stuck next to Phil in agonizing silence, you’re gonna wish you read this email.
Meet Dianne
Before we get started, we’ve got someone you should meet.
This is Dianne.
Built like a Rockmelon, Dianne, or Di, is a kind-hearted senior administrator of 16 years. Despite her warm temperament, she’s not immune to the occasional mood swing, which can be gauged by the intensity of her acrylics hammering her keyboard.
Today, Di’s going to help us prepare for EOFY drinks.
Why?
Because if you can hit it off with her, you can hit it off with anyone.
Let’s Do Some Fishing
For the next few minutes, you’re going to be a fisherman. Bear with us.
Imagine, for a moment, you cast an empty rod. Would you expect any nibbles? No. What if you cast multiple lines, all with fresh bait? Then things start to change. Nibbles are almost certain and you may very well catch a fish (unless Di eats it).
Our conversations function the same way. Our rods are different subjects and we want to cast as many as possible for our partner to bite onto. It’s as if we’re a gardener, planting little conversational seeds.
However, we’re not always the fishermen. Often, we have to be the fish. Unless they’re completely disinterested, our partner will often unknowingly cast lines of their own. If we pay attention to them, we can steer the conversation in any direction we want.
Let’s pretend you ask someone where they’re from. They respond with:
“I’m originally from Adelaide but I’ve recently moved to Melbourne for work. It’s been challenging but Adelaide was always a little quiet for my liking. Plus, I’m a bit of a foodie so Melbourne is much more my scene.”
They’ve just given you 5 different avenues to take the conversation down.
Adelaide
Melbourne
What they do for work
The challenge of the move
The Melbourne Foodie/restaurant scene
Even if their response was dryer than anticipated…
“I’m originally from Adelaide but I’ve recently moved up to Melbourne for work.”
You still have Adelaide, Melbourne, and what they do for work to talk about.
Putting it into Practice
So how can we apply this to EOFY drinks?
You’re at the bar. Let’s pretend you grab your drink, order a snack, and sit down with some colleagues.
As your food arrives, Di drifts over to your table.
”What’ve you got there?” she asks.
Let’s workshop a simple response.
“Hey Di, Espresso Martini. But I’ve gotta admit, living in Marrickville has definitely made me more of a beer person. There are so many cool breweries to choose from. What are you drinking?”
Our rods?
Cocktails
Marrickville
Pubs and breweries
And if all else fails, what Di’s drinking
Remember: people love to talk about themselves. So when it’s your turn to respond, pick the rod you think they’re going to enjoy talking about most.
Alright, that’s it. Cya next week 👋